Chapter 23 - Exploration

I returned to Indonesia, this time several years later, with a hunger for adventure. This time I took the initiative to explore everywhere I could, hiking to remote beaches and around islands. This time we only spent a summer away, but it was enough to once again take in the beauty of nature and the struggle of the third world. It was a great opportunity to see something vastly different to what I had ever seen before, and could ever imagine the world would be. Everything from the landscape to the people was different. We ate strange but delicious food, enjoyed the sandy beaches, and followed divers on their adventures with masks and snorkels.

Indoneisa wasn't the highlight of this time however. The highlight was the budding musician I saw inside myself as I began to master the violin and my voice. My voice was getting better, with a wider range, improved enunciation and improving tonality. People really liked my voice, especially when I sang in other languages, and I really enjoyed singing for them. Famous singers came to my school, and I sang for them, some of them even including my vocals on their professional recordings. I began to make a name for myself as an independant recording artist, though my fears got the better of me. I wouldn't let anyone credit me by name for the music I made because I feared that I would suffer from the fame. Many famous people told me fame wasn't what they thought it would be or what they wanted it to be, and at the start I wanted none of it. I simply wanted to sing with people, and I wasn't interested in the whole ordeal of producing music professionally and releasing it until later on.

Despite my fears, I continued my education at school and as a musician, working hard every day to learn new technique and quickly learning to improvise my own melody, harmony and chord progressions. My hard work really paid off, as people recognized what I was doing and showed their appreciation for the music. I even branched out of my social circle a bit and joined a robotics club at a local middle school near where I was going to school, teaching the other students what I had learned of robotics on my own and mastering the art of building and programming a robot.

I felt like life went by quickly, and my memory of the past still felt blurred. My skin was all in one piece, I didn't show any visible signs of trauma, but I could still feel the pain from my injuries. I didn't know what was happening and I was afraid. I didn't want life to just pass me by because I had gotten hurt, and I was intent on making up for what had happened even though I knew I was working harder than everyone else just to fit in. I wasn't fitting in either, I had few friends at school and I was steadily bullied. I was sad, but I didn't let it stop me from making music. Instead, I let it drive me to create more. I let it take over, and let my creativity flow whenever I felt sad as a strategy to cope with the trauma. It worked. I was growing, and learning quickly.

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